Click on a song to read lyrics
All lyrics by Mark Belanger except where noted

Distracted By Adventures In Healthcare (2014)
Always Horny And Hungry For Steak
I Don’t Give A Fuck About Your Couch
Spaceship 13, You Are Forbidden To Dock
Aunt Slappings

Float (2009)
Spook 234
Pussycat, Pussycat, Kill, Kill, Kill
Cowboys, I Think
Ho Ho Whatever
I Wouldn’t Have Spent That Year In College
The Less Than Successful Shakedown Cruise Of The U.S.S. Pfeifle
You Were Always On My Mind
Hey, My DAD’s Name Is Buzz
Chicken Little Vs. Snidley Whiplash (Kissinaminit)
… And The Wings Of The Eagle Are Brown

Nothing’s Ever Finished (2006)
Ask For Mussell Ramsey
Johnny Cash Rides His Coal Car Through Purgatory
Happy Go Rocket Terrapinmon
Brown Eyes And Choker

Other Songs
Bad Day
Corpus Canine
Don’t Do This To Me, Timothy
Feelgood Hit Of The Summer
F.J. Gallagher Will Have His Revenge On Bangor International Airport
I Could’ve Gotten You So Many Free Drinks
Midnight In The Garden Of Ghandi And Steiner
Neo-Realist Formica Dirge
No, I’m Laughing At Your Silly, Bedwetting, Vegetarian Children
Truckstop Romeo


Always Horny And Hungry For Steak

All any creature wants
Is to be full and warm
Sheltered from predation
All else is academic
The giant Montag wall
Or passing protein strains
Won’t mean as much as finding bread
When you see your Volga freezing

But I get to hear you
Fixate on horses balls
Stupid girl

When you’re the butt of jokes
You see on television
Are you laughing at yourself
Or does it pass right through you?
The vastness of the universe
Within the mind of God
Mathematically shown to prove
You’re a mote with little value

But you don’t get it
You’re both so certain
Stupid girls

Where the hell is my parade?
Where the hell is my parade?
Where the hell is my parade?
Where the hell is my parade?


If I had a modicum of sense I would turn on my heel and walk away
From the gorilla I was warned about before I had known it had slapped your ass
But oh no, not me
Got to turn and face it
And stare
And stare it in the face

I say it’s all about the eggroll

So I go up to this thing and I stare into its drunken eyes
And ask him how he’d feel if I treated someone he cared about that way?
What about your sister?
What about your mother?
Let’s call
Let’s call and see what she says

I say it’s all about the eggroll

And if in the waiting room you should happen to meet my mother
Tell her it’s all her fault that her boy is eating through a tube now
For bringing me up to think that people deserve better treatment than what you give
And then to my father for teaching me to mean what I say

I say it’s all about the eggroll

I Don’t Give A Fuck About Your Couch

I’m not ready to face the danger
And it’s best if I don’t explain why
It’s more convenient and tactful
If I wait ’til the monster arrives

While staring into the sink
I swear I could hear the hammer
And like a hibernating critter
I was backed in a corner and filthy

It’s better to wait
It’s better to wait
It’s all in the way
You try to pass it off
Rub it off
Cut it off
Turn it off

You don’t care that I’m dying
We know that we’re both lying
To keep our jaws from seizing
To prove our own irrelevance

But I doubt you can see it
I don’t see a reaction
You keep bleating with livestock eyes
Survey says I’m the seventh circle

Rip, tear, the price of self wrath
Seeing where you fit on the list
The breath between kaboom and plunger
Saying that I’ve had too much of this


When grabbing jewels from vipers
You’re risking painful swellings
But you just can’t stop reaching
Towards things both bright and shiny

Deep inside you know you’re stupid to try

A seemingly endless cycle
You live life touching stoves
But never fail to make that face
When you notice you’re palm is burning

You’ve got to stick a finger into the wound

Nobody ever asked you
It’s quaint you think we care
About the petty wants and needs of a grain of sand

A lifetime chasing specters
Infinite could have beens
Doesn’t bring more things to fingers
Your hand is empty, reaching

The nail hits the edge
The brain feels the sting
And even at the sight of blood you keep on prying
A scar is born
One you’ll ignore
And as you reach for the burner again you’re learning nothing


It must have been the Manhattan
When it all fell into place
Dean Martin was watching over me
And somehow kept you captivated
Well, it must have been the Manhattan
Because it sure the hell couldn’t have been me
Suave, charming, Professor Right Answer
It must have been the Manhattan

You said you were going
To the same place as the cherry in the glass
For some reason I followed you outside
I swear I was trying to be protective
Warm and balance challenged
We stumbled off together in the cold
Into someone else’s taxi
I paid the fare and wound up at your home

In the blink of an eye we were inside the door
And I was scratching your cat as you told me
Of how you desperately needed to wake for your train
And of a way you might find me helpful
So I took off my boots ever eager to serve
Although still unaware what was happening
And together we entered the dark of your room
Anticipating the impending morning
Well it must have been the Manhattan

Lying in the darkness
Nestled together trying to keep warm
I was too dim to notice then
That you had chosen not to wear your shirt

And as the thunderous sounds of Led Zeppelin IV
Fade away to your gentle snoring
Prurient, dutiful, I don’t want to sleep
Out of fear of missing this moment
But with a soul that’s this warm I finally fade out
After all, by now it’s only an hour
Until the screaming alarm ruins it all
No matter how much I want to keep this perfect blissful moment

You beg for me to shut it off, just nine more minutes more
Pillow talk of gardening leads to proof in pudding
A hand in the weeds and a face fully immersed in flower
Smelling the petals until the telephone rings
and you remember time and all its limits

Emerging from the shower
Like a white chocolate Venus frantically gathering things
Two waters, one banana
I help you pack and you leave in your car

And with some Norwegian wood tucked in under my belt
I step out in the cold air smiling
The sleepy smile of a grunt full holes and morphine
Given him by a beautiful field nurse
‘Cause when you can’t feel the wound you believe you’ll survive
And that’s always the first step in healing
Fade out and dream of the perfect lines of your face
And thank you for the much needed water

And I Thank God for Manhattans

Spaceship Thirteen, You Are Forbidden to Dock

I could try to sleep it off
But that just means I’d wake up here again
Isolated, watching nothing
There’s nothing left here to maintain
Trapped away inside this box
Like a monkey that’s lost in the mail somewhere
Waiting for the truck to stop
A truck the monkey never sees

And I am only in attendance
The phone stopped ringing years ago
I’m out of range and out of topics
And you’re distracted by shiny things
If I could only go Van Winkle
I wouldn’t have to do all this thinking
The conversations in silence to no one
I lie there angry only pretending

I’m afraid to check my mail
There might be nothing there
And I can see them through the window
The entities that may as well just be paintings

Things explode in a vacuum
They do so silently
Even if I pretend you’re listening
The creatures don’t care that it’s cold and dull in here

Aunt Slappings

The vomit on the front porch has dried
And humidity makes the flakes reconstitute into something terrible
Step to the left
Step broadly to the left
The vacuum bags don’t fit tightly and I’m absent minded

Old wet sponge
Lukewarm and stained from age
Filthy things
I have to touch them all the time
Don’t I?

I am plagued by vampires
That in lieu of my blood feed off of my time
I no longer understand the desires
of prepubescent boys no matter how much you’re shouting
You’ve already said this
I don’t care what you want
Just shut up and get it
You’ve already said this
Yes, you already said this

Thrown up into my face

And I swear my head’s
Been in the Shine-O-Ball-O
And this has to end

And you stand there crying “It isn’t fair”
but you’re the one who picked him
And as your camera goes rushing up his arm
Think of all the little ways that he says “I love you”

Victim of only choices
You are your own worst nemesis
Those choices lead to more “poor me” situations

I make up little ditties about you
That I sing just as soon as you walk away


I’ve heard it all before
You offer no new information
Yes, God Himself is out to get you
Your blameless case is well established
But tell me one more time

And as you just consume
Does it feel and taste just like your fair share?
There’s always so much more
When someone else is paying
You take all that they’ll hand out
But please take some of mine

I had some money
But you went and spent it
Now I’ve got nothing
As you feed on the cripple’s nipple
It’s the same old story
It’s the same old line
It’s the same old situation
It’s the same thing every time

But we’ll take care of you
‘Cause Jesus and my uncle say we have to

It’s the same old story
It’s the same old line
It’s the same old situation
It’s the same thing every time

Just a useless eater
Just a human parasite

Spook 234

Like a yellow stain on white pants
You pretend it doesn’t exist
And do your best to hide until the end of the day

Hoping that no one noticed
The brief parade of your shame
When you got up to get another pile of work

Cause once is tragic
And twice is funny
But three times is just sad

And there you’re found the next morning
Feet hanging out of the door
Pointed Earthward towards your frozen concrete steps

And none of the neighbors can tell
If you’re alive or you’re dead
As you lie snoring in a pile of your own sick

Cause once is funny
And twice is tragic
But three times is just sad

You hope that no one noticed
The brief parade of your shame
They all respect you,
Wouldn’t laugh behind your back

But its yellow, after all,
And triggers something prurient
Everyone turns thirteen when they see you pass by

Cause once is tragic
And twice is funny
But three times is just sad

Pussycat, Pussycat, Kill, Kill, Kill

Every fiber of my being
Is potential energy
I can’t hear a word you’re saying
I only see you bleeding

I want to kill
Meow, meow, meow

The simple fact that you exist
Makes me want to harvest your soul
Coiled up to go angry feral
Taking nourishment from your pain

I can almost taste it
Meow, meow, meow

Cowboys, I Think

It’s flat and dusty
You can see me coming for miles
No trees to conceal my air
That’s why you live here, maybe

Somehow you know
Maybe you just smell it
That’s why you bar the door
Standing by the window shaking

You must be afraid of me
Long before you can even see me

Lips tight you’re trying
The prey that dare not show its fear
There ain’t nothin for you here, stranger
That’s why you live here, maybe

You’d rather shoot me
Than to bother and get to know me
Just get back on your horse and ride
Any way but closer to me
That’s why I came here
Cause you don’t live here
I’ll tell your face, I’ll tell your corpse
Don’t you ever mess with Texas

Ho Ho Whatever

I will tell you that I’m aright when I’m not
That’s all you want to hear anyway
You don’t care I’m at the end of my rope and alone
I’m sure you’ve got your own problems to solve
I can call you cause it’s Christmas
And the right thing to do
Really wanting just to prove I’m alive
To dispel the illusion I’m angry at you
It just never seems the time or the place to complain

But if it’s all the same to you
I’ll crawl away and lick my wounds
And watch them fester by myself
Denying that they’re infected at all

Is it curious to God the things we never discard
The finger holes we always use to hang on?
The fantasies and addictions that pull us along
I’m sure hes got some bigger problems to solve
So I’m certain you don’t want to hear I’m falling apart
That’s not the kind of call you wish to receive
When I’m less a person than I am a thing
It just never seems the time or the place to complain

But if it’s all the same to you
I’ll still pretend that it’s all good
And do my best not let on
That you’re the salt that hurts and heals
Cause if you knew I fear you’d run
Or worse than that I fear you’d pounce
So I’ll just keep biting my big fat lip
If it would be all the same to you

I Wouldn’t Have Spent That Year in College

Dear Mr. Horse I can feel the walls are closing in
Please could you help me
it just all seems so freaking pointless
My candy dish is filled with razor blades
Immersed in antifreeze
What am I supposed to do when my hair gets wet when I’m in the tub?

Please Mr. Horse
Please Mr. Horse
Please Mr. Horse
Help me out of here

Dear Mr. Horse I’ve had just as much as I can take
Every days a rainy window waiting for my Grizzlebys
I try to clean the stove but only ever seem to clean the back
Why do you always scream when I try to make Pop Tarts in the tub?

The Less Than Successful Shakedown Cruise Of The U.S.S. Pfeifle

It’s getting colder and I know I’m never returning
It’s only a matter of time ’till the structure implodes
You’re probably making some lunch
’cause that’s what you should do now
And no one’s aware that they need to inform you to mourn

The union boys said
That the welds would hold
But they are not here with us now

The weight of the water above may as well be boulders
Walking the halls well aware that this is where it ends
They sent us out to see if their vessel was worthy
They’ll get their answer but never will get back their boat

Nine miles away
And twelve leagues up
You think you miss me now

You Were Always On My Mind

My heart races when I hear your name
I think about you now every day
Many know you but few of them trust you
And those who do are rightly looked on as fools

The silent muse of a thousand songs and stories
All are emphatic but not all of them good
We both tell lies to get what we’re after
And worry later just who will pay the bill

I know you’re no good for me
We keep secrets we don’t want to tell
Cause anywhere you go
To anyone who knows you
You’ll always be the focus of the room

I try to hide the fact we recently spoke
Even from those who know that we’ve met
The fact we’re meeting would just raise suspicion
And there’s no time to hear a lecture from them

And so we hide out in stairwells and bathrooms
Minding time to not be seen
Then mill about like nothing happened
Wipe our noses and bitch about the cold

My hands are shaking
I’m shivering my fingertips are cold
My heart does butterflies
Merely thinking of you
Not noticing that I’ve been up all night

You’re like an itch
I cant reach with my tongue
Make me forget
I don’t impress anyone
Say Ill be good
But here I am again
Face down in you
Face down in you again

(originally by Broken Clown)

Stare at the walls when there’s nobody here
Pull down the shades, ’cause I hate the sunshine
Every day turns out just like the last
Someday it will stop and nothing much will really change

And I am just part of the hive

Parts are replaced when machines start to break
Eventually winding up on the scrap pile
And what makes you so different that anyone will notice when you’re gone?

I won’t change nothing at all
Just another maggot in the pile

Free will is irrelevant
Just a weird coincidence
Busy monkeys with busy delusions
Just another maggot in the pile

Hey, My DAD’s Name Is Buzz

You probably wouldn’t mind it half as much
If you thought you could get it off you
Half the reason that it itches so much
Is so you’ll help it make more things that itch

Barbie knows she has a limited shelf life
That’s exactly why she hates you so much
Trying to get you to eat more fresh fruit
Only helps to wear out her features and furniture

I’d advise that you don’t open that door
Something dead decays in there
Keep your mouth shut, I’ve been meaning to throw it out
I’m just waiting for the courage to go in there

You sold you soul for a golf shirt
With a logo embroidered on the left breast
Does the dais of corpses you stand on
Substitute the respect and affection

But I doubt it could hang on as well if
It didn’t have teeth sunk into your neck
And as the poison eats through your insides
We just shrug and say you need your rest

Chicken Little Vs. Snidely Whiplash (Kissinaminit)

Standing opposing face to face
Your left looks like my right
If one of us turns to side by each
We see it essentially the same
But if both spin it’s back to back
The inevitable position of duels
One more about the glove
Than about anything that was said

When did this become a cult?

Two Coins Two Faces
We have our favorites
Remember they’re both facing heads
You want a lollypop
While I say you should get to eat what you kill
Two different foods two different tastes
Ironically, both from the market
Flowers and flesh a shared disdain
Of the prey and the purely symbolic

You say the sky is falling
I say we’re on a bigger pile
You scream pudding for all
While I shout candy comes from a factory
Two different foods two different tastes
Ironically, both from the market
Flowers and flesh a shared disdain
Of the prey and the purely symbolic

When did this become a cult?

You fear Baptists with rifles and oil wells
While I fear men in uniforms with cameras and cattle cars
Before this conversation started we were only fast friends
But I say one thing we can be sure of

If only one of us is right,
They’re still coming for both of us

When did this become a cult?

… And The Wings Of The Eagle Are Brown

Their friend was dead
Cut down in his prime
And hung as a message
To those of like mind
Sit down and shut up
Or you’ll get the same

So they got the message
And moved underground
Waiting in patience
For the fix of it all
The Devil ain’t coming
He lives over there

Just because you live there
Doesn’t mean you don’t want to see it burn
Like a giant television
Blowing up in front of all the world
They might have done it
To say that it’s time
They might have done it
To make sure it was time

And it makes me wonder
If the people living next door
Ache to see a repeat
Of what went on in 64

Now look around you at all that you see
All that you hold dear
And all that you own
Now imagine the distaste
If it wasn’t yours

Like a diamond Mercedes
Illegally parked
You just want to break it
Or see it get towed
Really, just because it isn’t yours

(originally by Black Sabbath)

What you get and what you see
Things that don’t come easily
Feeling happy in my vein
Icicles within my brain

Something blowing in my head
Winters ice, it soon will spread
Death would freeze my very soul
Makes me happy, makes me cold

My eyes are blind but I can see
The snowflakes glisten on the tree
The sun no longer sets me free
I feel there’s no place freezing me

Let the winter sun shine on
Let me feel the frost of dawn
Fill my dreams with flakes of snow
Soon Ill feel the chilling glow

Don’t you think I know what Im doing
Don’t tell me that its doing me wrong
You’re the one who’s really a loser
This is where I feel I belong

Crystal world with winter flowers
Turns my day to frozen hours
Lying snowblind in the sun
Will my ice age ever come?

Ask For Mussell Ramsey

If I wait ’till Monday
I still won’t believe you
So I keep on fuming
Like it’s only Friday
Yes. I know I’m ugly
Thanks for the reminder
Just in case I ever
Thought I could be worth anything

You made your point

I don’t need to meet the
Cock you’re bouncing on now
If it’s all the same I’d
Simply rather not know
I need a cigarette
Like I want a shotgun
For all the wrong reasons
And, of course RIGHT NOW

All better now?
You’re warm inside?
On top again
All better now

The sticky side of friendship
Sour tastes and handshakes
Nothing is ever bitter
When you refine sugar
But for those of us who
Work the plantation
Please forgive us when we
Dream of 1793

You made your point

Johnny Cash Rides His Coal Car Through Purgatory

Someday they’ll lay you out at peace
You died of old age, not VD
You weren’t the type to overdose
Or stick a shotgun down your throat

You might think that you’ve got it made
For your existence past the grave
You weren’t a saint, but far from monster
Perhaps you could have had it wrong

It’s always hard to live up
To standards that Man-Gods hold up
He promises that you’ll get forgiveness
But never said you’d get it NOW

Your mamma never taught you this
‘Cause you weren’t brought up Catholic
That every action has a price
That you must pay for when you die

‘Cause Heaven’s only for the pure
Not for shut-ins soiled with porn
You need some time to work the filth off
Harvesting children in the mines

A place where nothing really grows
Quite well enough to make you whole
Not wholly bad, but it could use improvement
Who’d fill a Koi pond up with toads?

And every Limbo boy and girl
Slightly unfit for gates of pearl
Wake up for work every morning
To fill the hoppers up with souls

Not the worst job you’ve ever had
But still, the distance keeps you sad
Though every day still gets you closer
To the so long promised reward

And though Luther doesn’t believe it
You load the cars with the unborn
To send them up for distribution
Upon the loving breath of God

Some say the worst job in the place
Is held by the one who drives the train
‘Cause only they see what they’re truly missing
But aren’t allowed to hang around


I’m sorry you don’t like the way I broke your eggs
I’ll light a candle for you next time I go to pray
It’s alright
It’s alright
Another lie you tell to yourself
It’s alright
It’s alright
It will go away

I bet you look like Auschwitz without all your clothes
But the smirk on your face says you like it that way
I’m worthy
They like me
Another lie you know that you tell
It’s alright
It’s alright
It will go away

What better way to demonstrate you’re in control?
Than to make him pay your way all night
then throw it up alone
‘Cause you know you’re not pretty
That’s a secret you think you keep to yourself
It’s alright
It’s alright
It’s alright
We don’t matter anyway

Poor baby
Poor baby
No focus on you
Poor baby
Poor baby
Poor baby
No one worships you

You might be useful if you made pornography
But until then you’re just anathema to me
Another self-righteous cunt who thinks that
Everything’s about her
It’s alright
It’s alright
It’s alright
We don’t listen anyway

Happy Go Rocket Terrapinmon

Nothing’s ever finished it just gets put down
To rear its head when it’s convenient to the cause
And I’m made to confess sins not known to be taboo to you
A scapegoat to ride out of town
in the name of what you can’t control

And Oh by the way
Did you see someone still had to go to work today?
Holding his eyes in his palms
‘Cause the sleep isn’t there
And the cash don’t go far enough

To give you all you want would be viewed as a start
An act of compliance
Opening doors to let the real changes begin
An annexation of a soul that only wants to stop the rain
Only to have your soggy feet wiped on its face when you come in

Oh By the way
Did you say, something managed to still go wrong today?
Away from the magnetic pull of
Cigarettes and the chocolate fix
I am the drain through which will pass
The tedium and sloth of the world
Holding you back from the dreamhouse world
You painted for yourself

Before you twist the knife you wave it in my face
(Look at this just look at this)
And hold me liable for trespasses of others
(You are them you made me do this)
I stare at Karo eyes that can’t even see the prey is here
(Eyes, eyes, your empty eyes)
To receive the passive aggressive abuse
To bolster your self worth

Oh by the way
Did you say something still managed to go wrong today?
Despite the assistance of
Your psychic friends and the Prozac stash
I am the drain through which will pass
The tedium and sloth of the world
Holding you back from the dreamhouse world
You painted for yourself

Brown Eyes And Choker

All I’ve got is an index card, probability and a wire
Keeping me in a self made state of agoraphobia
Rewards are paid to the bold
But the timid still have options
So I stare at the telephone
But the circuit never seems to close

Hours feel like desperate years full of beards and coconuts
Searching for a random plane
That only turns out to be another albatross

It’s hard to recall the shape of your face
After seeing the depth in your eyes
Theological mathematics capsuled in a single frame
Your aura is like getting shot by a dart full of endorphins
Unable but to submit to what I hope is benevolence

I don’t play free cell because it stimulates my mind
Falling sand to remind me I’m sitting busy doing nothing

You ask me if I know I’m smarter than the average bear
And I ask what does it matter
When I look how far its got me
My epic mastery of the wrong place at the right time
Atrophies ambition into dreams of a drunken Mitty

I could put all this to rest but I’m afraid what the answer is
Words ricochet inside my head but never escape to the air
Giving in to O.C.D. ’cause I can’t seem to smoke enough
What’s the point of knowing you could
When you’re pretty sure that you won’t?

If I could distil signals I would be a wealthy man
Instead of a fat-assed shut in watching Aqua Teen
And waiting for my Onion Burst

You ask me if I know I’m smarter than the average bear
And I ask what does it matter
When I look at all the good its done me
I’m just a teenage boy in a rapidly decaying shell
Who lost the luster being smarter than the average bear

Bad Day
(originally by Broken Clown)

I could wrap something ugly up in a bow
and mail it to you all covered in Christmas seals

But it won’t put forth just exactly what I want to say
I’m just trying to tell you I had a bad day

Heard the icing fell off your big black cake
too bad your party didn’t turn out the way you planned

You know I can’t be sober around you anyway
you never let me tell you about my bad day

Corpus Canine
(originally by Broken Clown)

Every time I see a dog I wish I had a pistol
I’d put a round into its empty skull
and then I’d kick it as it’s bleeding

Next time you growl or bear your teeth at me
I swear I’ll make you fucking pay
I’ll feed you steak laced with sharpened shards of springs
And then I’ll talk to you as the razors cut on the inside

Who’s all bark and no bite now?

Don’t Do This To Me, Timothy
(originally by Broken Clown)

I’m afraid you must excuse me
But I’m feeling rather useless
It’s too late I feel you have overstayed your welcome
I cannot make this any more obvious
I don’t care about anything that you’ve said

It still remains a mystery where you get your information
I feel you have been watching my every move

So once again you see me as an alien
A tool for you to execute your master plan

So you take what you want from me
Until I’ve been forgiven
And I’m reeling with certainty
That my life is worth living again

Thank you, good night
You’ve been such a wonderful audience
But soon we will be leaving, I regret

So you take what you want from me
Until I’ve been forgiven
And I’m reeling with certainty
That my life’s worth living again

If I sold my soul to you, would you cheat me once again?
No, you can’t do this to me, Timothy

Feelgood Hit Of The Summer
(originally by Broken Clown)

It’s all been said before and I am tired of the arguing
It’s all just like before
We’re both one ear and out the other side
And so it drips away
like teenage tears through thick mascara
And leaves me wondering just why I bother trying anymore

I wait for you out in the cold like a tethered dog

Sometimes I wish they hadn’t found my rope
and I had made it
Instead I’m sitting here berated by your subtle questions
And like you said before
I should just “get over it”
But tell me what you feel has been accomplished
when I feel I’m three feet tall?

You’re waiting for a white Mercedes I’ll never own

I wait for you to come around
To no avail

F.J. Gallagher Will Have His Revenge On Bangor International Airport
(originally by Broken Clown)

Go rouse the dead
Go piss them off
Go rouse the dead
Don’t bring them home

Get really drunk
Get really suave
So suave you wretch
Go drink some more

Go have a mood
Fuck something up
Don’t pay you bills
Say something cruel

I Could’ve Gotten You So Many Free Drinks
(music and lyrics by Ed Porter)

All I want is nothing
To wash my hands of tarnished rings
What did you expect to prove
By rubbing salt into the wound?

You’re only around
To scar what was left
Why does every breeze
Seem to reek of your breath?

Midnight In The Garden Of Ghandi And Steiner
(originally by Broken Clown)

You’re disappointed with your life and how it works for you
You tend to make grandiose plans that always boomerang
You never thought back then
that it would all turn out like this
You saw yourself on a white horse only to do the shoveling

You crawl inside of it every chance you get
Trying in vain to keep demons at bay

They shut down all your dreams,
and so you just shut them out
And swallowed your escape
in an ever changing world of things
A well that’s tapped too often will eventually run dry
While every thirsty mouth
exclaims that it has its special needs

You run away from it every chance you get
Trying to deny that it ever happened
But it creeps up on you every chance it gets
And picks the callouses you call emotions

Neo-Realist Formica Dirge
(originally by Broken Clown)

The open highway passes by, a blur at sixty-five
A cigarette for every mile
I am empowered by the state to cremate dinosaurs
And spoil the future of your sons

I can see it looming
Looming in the distance
I keep it to myself
I’d hate to have you worry

I turn the wheel, turn off my mind
Asphalt preoccupies
I keep control, despite my state
And that my mouth is dry
I’m trying hard no to dwell on the bitter side of things
But every time I think of you I just wish it could be over

I lie awake all by myself and contemplate the news
What are they hiding from me now?
Space aliens and soldiers gearing for the overthrow
Clantz likes to keep me well informed

I try to deny for just a little bit longer

I close my eyes and think of you
You’re just a memory
An exercise in wasted days of things that should have been
It’s wrong to sit and plot your death
And wrong to let you leave
I sing another dirge to you,
But I just wish it could be over

So if I seem perplexed, don’t take it personally
A lot is weighing on my mind
So what does it all matter now?
I’m standing powerless
And none of this is all your fault

I close my eyes and see your face
You’re just a memory
You’re something that would plague my mind
from ancient history
I’m trying hard not to dwell on the bitter side of things
I tell myself it’s all spilled milk
I just wish it could be over

No, I’m Laughing At your Silly, Bedwetting, Vegetarian Children
(originally by Broken Clown)

Blood running softly
from my nose on to the bathroom floor
Not sure if I’d want you to see
I hope you’re doing well
and everything works out for you
Why do you always run away?

It’s all a blur
Don’t think I could tell you what happened yesterday
But I’ll probably pay for it tomorrow You can buy confidence, but it may not work out for you
What does it take to make you pray?

Waiting for you to wake up
Waiting until I calm down
Waiting until were both sober
Waiting until I go numb

You never know just what you’ve got until it punches you
Until it slaps you in the face
No thing is timeless
And nothing is had without a price
I say another prayer for you

Truckstop Romeo
(originally by Broken Clown)

You like to have things to keep on your shelf
Some kind of macabre memento
of places that you could control
You pull them down when you need a crutch
And when they are no longer useful
they are promptly put away

You like to blame all of your faults on Daddy didn’t love you
He never showered you with praise
Numbing yourself in your endless search
to fill potential spaces
Until you feel nothing at all

It’s only DNA running down your leg
No consequence to face
It’s only DNA

And will you find another truckstop romeo
looking for pieces?
Who will stand by you until the ice wears thin?
I hope you die lonely and afraid, cunt

And if the freak hunt and the chemical thighs
Leave you holding souvenirs
that shit and keep you up at night
Don’t be alarmed when you reach to your shelf
To see you only find there the broken remnants of us